December 20, 2011

Split decision

The voices ring through the silent night. Giggles and loud bursts of chatter followed by lower murmuring. The talking and the listening in on the baby monitor has been well documented on this blog. But this week, the conversations are bitter sweet.

In another week or so, new beds will arrive at our house. I will assemble them and, for the first time, put Swee’Pea’s bed in one room… and TheMonk’s bed in another. Even as I write this, the tears well up in my eyes at the prospect of the twins being separated at night. I knew this day would come but now I’m not so sure I want it.

I want to hold onto the love and comfort that these two give each other. i want to hold onto the innocence of youth and the love of siblings that has never been stronger. I want to hold onto the notion of Swee’Pea and TheMonk being an inseparable team, conspiring, sharing, protecting, supporting and, yes, even fighting. They’ve always had each other and now… it feels like they won’t.

Tonight, I turned up the baby monitor that has never left their room (but not always turned on) and listened to them talk about computer games and canopy beds and everything that’s important to six-year-olds. I reminisced about all the great conversations I’ve heard. Singing. Arguments. Constant talking and cute comments. Wonderful memories that I hope I never forget.

And as we head towards this bittersweet milestone, I pray that they will always remember the closeness that only they can share and that this bond can survive the distance of a wall and two doors.

In the meantime, forgive me if I shed some tears.


  1. I split my two up a few months ago. The four-year age difference between them and the boy/girl stuff was starting to become an issue. The 8YO needed her space and the 4YO needed to start getting some confidence in his independence. That said, it broke my heart to see them hit this milestone. And, the 8YO admits that sleeping alone gets, well, lonely sometimes.

    Growing up sucks.

    Comment by Nancy [Spinning My Plates] — December 21, 2011 @ 8:48 am

  2. Oh, we did this in June. Believe it or not, it was harder on me than on them.

    Brayden embraced it wholeheartedly. Baylee gave him 7 nights in his new room before she joined him. In his bed, in his room.

    Now, I make them sleep in their own rooms on school nights, but they are free to team up on weekends. Funny thing? She ALWAYS goes to his room (he never goes to hers) b/c she needs to be with him more than he needs to be with her.

    I hope your kids will embrace having a little independence.

    Comment by amy — December 21, 2011 @ 9:27 am

  3. We moved so that my twins could each have their own room on the same floor of the house where our (my husband’s and my) room is. This was when they were 4. Now they are 11 (nearly 12) and like Amy, we still find on weekends almost always they will sleep in one room – one on the floor. They do sleep in their own rooms during the week when they are in school, because we require that. And if he’s gone for a sleepover at someone else’s house, chances are good she’s sleeping on the floor of our room!

    Comment by Moira — December 22, 2011 @ 8:08 am

  4. You are forgiven. My 5-year old is now in a room of her own and her older sister (who is 12 going on 17) alternates between being my lovely daughter and some strange creature who has my daughter’s face but is strangely sullen and uncommunicative and who spends hours barricaded in her room. I know all about tears over milestones ;-)

    Happy New Year!

    Comment by Elisa — January 1, 2012 @ 3:46 pm

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