December 7, 2008

He’s going to fit in great in 7th grade gym class

This weekend has introduced a new chapter in our lives parenting a little boy. Recently, within the past few weeks, poo-poo jokes have become the rage. I mean, they are funny as hell to a little three-year-old boy who just loves to say “poo-poo.” Every joke has to do with fecal matter and I’ll be damned if that just doesn’t send the little guy into belly laughs galore.

But lately TheMonk’s boy-ness has grown to new levels. For example, just yesterday, the boy took his oversized Dora baseball bat, positioned it at groin-level and shouted, “Look at my penis!” Of course, this was followed by hysterical laughing that all but drowned out the stern talking to given to him by his parents.

Later that night, as we were tucking our little ones into bed, Mommy leaned over to give TheMonk a kiss while he lay in his bed. TheMonk took this opportunity to pull up the tail of his stuffed monkey and pretend that the monkey was farting in his Mommy’s face.

Then, today, TheMonk walks up to me, turns around and begins rubbing his little butt on my leg while laughing out loud.

Lovely Wife and I began talking about our little potty mouth and I was quick to blame the little hoodlums he hangs out with at daycare. Which little punk is putting this kind of filth in my kid’s mind? Whose parent am I going to have to corner and let them know all of their penis talk has not been appreciated in this household.

And then I had a thought.

What if it’s MY kid that’s been doing all the penis talk at daycare? What if the scenes I described above are being played out in households throughout my community and that I will be the one confronted by an angry mob of parents who want to stick it to the Dad of the kid who likes to talk about male appendages, breaking wind and rubbing what his mama gave him against people’s legs.

Hmmmmmmm. Maybe I’ll have Lovely Wife take him to daycare tomorrow.

7 Comments

  1. That is so awesome that it is your kids instead of mine…so far. I keep waiting for the day Pookie’s echolalia picks up something that it shouldn’t and we get to listen to 12 hours of unstoppable inappropriateness and several hours of teachers and principals talking to us about how they cannot allow him to talk like that in school and I’ll have to get all “Freedom of Speech” on them and “My checkbook is right here. Who do I make out this donation to the library to?”

    Comment by BeAGoodDad — December 8, 2008 @ 10:45 am

  2. haha. boys are awesome. the toilet humor starts young.

    Comment by ali — December 8, 2008 @ 10:50 am

  3. Just think, you could have had twin boys! HAAAAHAAAA,I love it! As we say here in the People’s Republic of Santa Cruz, Karma, Dude

    Comment by Grandmother — December 8, 2008 @ 11:00 am

  4. Maybe you could send him to the 7th grade gym class now? I bet he’d be a hit.

    Comment by Deanna — December 8, 2008 @ 12:03 pm

  5. I’d like to tell you it’s a phase….but I’d be lying.

    Comment by Ed (zoesdad) — December 8, 2008 @ 6:52 pm

  6. He starts pinching butts and you are DOOMED!

    Comment by Anissa@Hope4Peyton — December 9, 2008 @ 6:35 pm

  7. Well I guess children knows this stuffs already at an early age.

    Comment by Pregnancy Mom — December 9, 2008 @ 10:29 pm

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