I have learned the having three year old twins can be a great source of entertainment for me. For instance, did you know three-year-olds will pretty much repeat anything you teach them? It’s true. Of course, what’s entertaining for me, is not always entertaining for my beautiful wife. I mean, she has this crazy idea that we should be teaching them positive things. Like that’s any fun.
For instance, lately TheMonk seems to be slowly leaving the 3T sized underwear and heading for 4T land. How I know this is that he’s been picking at the underwear wedged up into his posterior at regular intervals. And since I only buy underwear for myself every five or six years… He might be in this predicament for a while.
Since I figured he should have the vocabularly to properly discuss his uncomfortableness, I explained that what he was experiencing was called a “wedgie.” I did not explain how to use it in a sentence but the boy is smart and has figured that out all by himself. Now, it’s not uncommon for him to announce out loud, “Daddy, I have a wedgie! Fix my wedgie! Daaaa-deeeeee fix my wedgie, please!”
What’s funny is hearing him say wedgie. What’s not so funny is me having to fix the wedgie. I guess my next lesson will be to teach that guy how to pick at his own wedgie.
But I’m not the only one influencing his choice of words. This past week he came home and started saying at random times, out of the blue, “Nice to meet you… Booty!” This always produces a good belly laugh from TheMonk and even his sister has joined in. Lately, however, they’ve been upping the ante by substituting words for certain male and female genetalia or for certain bodily functions for the word “booty.” Let me tell you, it’s not pleasant to have to hear, “Nice to meet you… Poo Poo!” over and over again. So, we have told them we don’t talk about that in public. That it’s private and no one wants to hear about it.
So, now TheMonk and Swee’Pea will announce, “Nice to meet you… Booty!” and then, as an afterthought, announce in an equally loud voice, “We don’t say ‘Nice to meet you… Poo Poo’ because that’s private!”
*Sigh* How do I even argue with that?
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