August 26, 2005

Lesson’s learned in the past 12 weeks

  • Sleep deprivation is a really effective means of torture
  • Velcro on diapers rank with one of the greatest innovations ever
  • Bottle warmers are a complete waste of time
  • The quickest way to tell if it’s time for a diaper change is to smell the babies’ backside
  • My wife is a much deeper sleeper than I thought she was
  • Babies really don’t like it when you suction out their nose
  • Babies won’t accept $20, $50 or even $100 to just… stop… crying
  • Dinner time is whenever we find time to shove something down our throats
  • Anything that can be heated in the microwave is my new favorite food
  • When you “burp” a baby, the gas doesn’t always come out of the mouth
  • 1 out of every 10 people who learn I have boy/girl twins ask if they’re identical
  • There isn’t a Human Resources person out there that really understands the Family Medical Leave Act.
  • More women smile at you when you have a baby strapped to your chest.
  • If you wipe down a baby with a damp washcloth and then slather scented baby lotion on, everyone will think your baby just had a bath.
  • Don’t say anything you don’t want the neighborhood to know in front of the baby monitor.
  • Sometimes it takes having twins to finally meet your neighbors
  • I still have no desire to taste the breast milk
  • Going to the bathroom requires more advanced planning than it used to
  • Our parents call a lot more now that we have given them grandchildren
  • Eventually, even the cat will adjust to having twins

Okay fellow parents, what have you learned


  1. [...] My post [...]

    Pingback by Childs Play x2 — Because having one just wasn’t enough. » Imitation is sincerest form of flattery? — November 15, 2005 @ 8:32 pm

  2. [...] I like this post. In fact, I liked it a lot when I originally wrote it. [...]

    Pingback by Childs Play x2 — Because having one just wasn’t enough. » Plagiarism Update — November 16, 2005 @ 8:11 am

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