June 7, 2005

The Law of Physics

After a marathon Target shopping spree for last minute baby items, Andrea declares she’s hungry and suggests the local burger restaurant as a place to eat. I agree and we head over to the restaurant. We are seated in a manner of minutes and the host leads Andrea and I past a bunch of tables and booths on our way to seat us. The theme of the restaurant is Hawaiian and surf boards and palm fronds adorn the walls. Televisions throughout the restaurant are showing Xtreme sports like kite surfing and mountain bike riding. The restaurant is crowded and Andrea is drawing her usual stares at the size of her belly as we pass through. The host shows us to a booth where I slide in quickly on my side. I turn to watch Andrea as she sits on the bench and turns to slide into her side of the booth. But there’s a problem. Andrea’s belly bumps into the table as she makes a quarter turn to face me. All three of us, me, Andrea and the host realize at the same time that the booth won’t do - Andrea’s belly is too big. Andrea starts to laugh and I join in. I glance around to the booths around us and, it seems, that no one missed the pregnant lady trying to squeeze into a booth. People are laughing (with us, Honey, not at us) as Andrea stands. A woman across from us exclaims, “I hope that baby is due soon!” The host quickly stammers, “I was going to sit you at the table back there, but there wasn’t a chair! I’ll go get one right now.” He scurries off to find a chair. In a matter of seconds we are seated at a table.

After the host leaves, Andrea and I look at each other and laugh.

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