November 15, 2005

The Adventures of JT and Bri, Part III

To see the first two installments of the Adventures of JT and Bri, go here.
(Once you’re there, scroll down to see part I.)

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Me Oh My
My Oh Me
It’s the return of the Adventures
Of JT and Bri

While we’ve been away
We’ve grown leaps and bounds
In fact JT is almost
Seventeen pounds

Bri is the little one
She’s about two pounds lighter
But don’t go messin’ with her
‘cause she is a fighter

And don’t let her cuteness
Cause you to doubt her
‘cause she’ll scream and she’ll yell
louder and louder

JT has mellowed
Since his very first days
But make him wait for a feeding
And his anger will blaze

He gets a bit cranky
And ever so grumbly
Screaming “Can’t you tell
That my tummy’s so rumbly!?”

But other than that
We can’t really complain
In fact, Daddy wants more
Now is that quite insane?

Now amidst all these changes
Mommy went back to work
So Daddy took over
Trying not to go all berserk

There’s been sweat. There’s been tears.
But so far no blood
Just a sensitive daddy
Who’s a really big stud. :)

But the time’s going fast
As we knew that it would
And if I could slow time
I would if I could.

So day care is looming
And Mommy and Daddy will try
To present a stiff upper lip
(but you know we’ll both cry)

But this is okay
‘cause we’re in this together
And we’ll be a close family
Forever and ever

So as we move on,
There’ll be so much to see
Stick around for the Adventures
Of JT and Bri.

August 13, 2005

The Adventures of JT and Bri, Part II

When we last left our heroes they had just left the hospital and Mommy, Daddy and babies had all made it home safely.


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So JT and Bri were plopped in their crib
With matching onesies and an “I (heart) Grandma” bib
They were sleepy and tired without much to say
Between sleeping, eating and pooping all day

It soon became apparent, the two weren’t the same
JT was the wild one while Bri was quite tame
JT would greet you with a growl and a grunt
While Bri had the cry of a cute little runt

It soon became clear that two babies weren’t easy
And it’s not just the diapers making them queasy
No time to sleep, no time to rest
Who knew parenthood could be such a test

Meanwhile, Mom and Dad, were they in this too deep
Or did it just seem that way with so little sleep
They weren’t outnumbered, they matched up one-on-one
But if you’re keeping score, you knew they were done

And in the beginning the babies fed from a tube
That came along side a finger, and not from the boob
It took hours and hours to finish the feed
Making Mom and Dad question, “Why did we breed!”

Finally, they couldn’t take it no more!
So they called in a consultant who came to their door.
She examined them carefully without any luck
Until she exclaimed, “These babies can’t suck!”

No wonder it’s taken them so long to eat
They just aren’t that good when put to the teat
But using these bottles will give them more power
Soon you’ll feed by the minute instead of the hour!

With this small change, everything seemed so right
The mood of the house changed from darkness to light
Mommy & Daddy could now sleep in ’til noon
(And if you believe that, I’d like to sell you the moon)

Now eight weeks have passed since the babies’ birth day
So they coo and they smile and react well to play
JT eats well, he’s as big as a house
While Brianna is smaller, like a little field mouse

Mommy and Daddy have adjusted well too
And the house seems less and less like a zoo
The only one who would dispute any of that
Would be poor, neglected Nutmeg the cat

Now Mom and Dad have experience under their belt
And the babies are still making loving hearts melt
There’ll be more to this story so stop by and see
Another installment of the Adventures of JT and Bri

July 20, 2005

The Adventures of JT and Bri - Part I

JT and Bri were born, one would say,
in what most would consider the usual way.
Lots of gore, lots of goo and acting all surly
Not unlike their mother when she found they’d come early

JT, he came first, and he had plenty to say
“HELLO EVERYONE! NOW, GET OUT OF MY WAY”
“IT’S COLD, I’M A MESS, JUST LOOK AT MY HAIR”
“AND, HEY, DON’T FORGET ABOUT MY SISTER IN THERE!”

As if on cue, little Brianna appeared
Looking far cuter than her father had feared.
She cried some at first, but then settled down
Her face locked into a perpetual frown

The nurses were fawning over JT and Bri
While Daddy took pictures for the whole world to see
They were prodded and tested and handled with care
While Daddy looked on with a slightly stunned stare

The babies, now clean were brought out to their mom
Who was so high on drugs, she looked eerily calm
We bade Mommy goodbye to get measured and weighed
With Daddy in tow, at his side they both stayed.

Those first days were a blur, people coming and going
With signs of fatigue on their parent’s face showing
Daddy exclaimed “Let’s leave! I can’t take it no more!”
“For how can we rest with this oft opened door?”

Doctors, Assistants, Consultants and Nurses
All were the brunt of some of Daddy’s late curses
Finally! They left for their humble abode.
Daddy driving the most cautious, slow car on the road

Daddy gripping the wheel, with his head on a swivel
Not really listening to the radio’s drivel
His head full of cobwebs and sleep-deprived hazy
Operating the car like he was driving Ms. Daisy.

At last they arrived feeling a little subdued
With heavy fatigue shading their mood
Everyone went to bed and soon were asleep
Not fully knowing the hours they’d soon keep

But they made it home with their two bundles of joy
A cute little girl and handsome young boy
There’s more to this tale, as you can plainly see
So stay tuned for more adventures of JT and Bri.