TheMonk, seeing an obese woman in the airport, shouts in awe, “Look Daddy, that woman is big!
TheMonk, seeing an elderly gentleman getting wheeled down the airport hallway in a wheelchair, announces, “Look Daddy, that man can’t walk!”
After getting on the airplane…
“Are we flying yet?… Daddy, are we flying yet?… Are we flying yet?… Are we flying now?… Daddy, when are we gonna fly?… After the ladies talk about safety?… Where are the ladies?… Are we flying now?… When are the ladies gonna talk?… Are we next, Daddy?… Are we gonna fly now, Daddy?… Are we flying yet?…”
“I want waaaa-terrrrr. I’m thirsty. I want waaaaa-terrrrr. I want waaaaa-terrrrrrrrrr, Daddy. I’m thirsty. I want waaaaaaa-terrrrrrrrrrr.” [Told he has to wait for the beverage cart to come] “But I want it nowwwwwwwwwwwwww. I want waaaaaaa-terrrrrrrrrr. I’m thirrrrrrrrrrsty.”
“I want to sit with Daddy. No, I want to sit with Daddy. No, I want to sit with Daddy. No, I want to sit with Daddy.” [Daddy really wanted them to sit with Mommy at this point.]
This is just a small taste of what we encountered on our two plane, four hour jaunt home last night. On top of the whining, we also had two trips each to the bathroom, including being squished inside a 2 foot by 2 foot box with a pooping toddler. Wiping took some acrobatics I didn’t know I had.
The kids were tired from a long week at Grandma and Grandpa’s and we erred by thinking they’d sleep on a later flight. No, they just took out their tiredness on the entire cabin. No amount of sticker books, magna doodles or vanilla wafers were enough to calm the beasts within. If you were on our plane or directly underneath our Denver to So Cal route (for I’m sure you heard us from a measly 35,000 feet), then I apologize profusely.
Although if that lady in front of us had turned around to look at me wrestling with cranky, crying toddlers one more time, I would be writing this from jail.
And I only briefly considered jumping from the plane but decided against it when I realized I’d hear them screaming all they way down.
Anyway, after sleeping in today, a three hour nap and some serious painkillers (for me, not the kids), Swee’Pea and TheMonk are almost back to normal.
I, on the other hand, will need a bit more
Being angelic on the trip out to see grandparents.
The return trip on the other hand…